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Tuesday, June 30, 2015

My Love Story

So there's this guy..and he's pretty awesome if I say so myself. The story I'm about to tell you is way better than The Notebook..it even beats Titanic..I know how is that possible? This guy has treated me like a princess. It's WAY better than any love story I've ever watched, sorry Nicholas Sparks but he beats you too. It's hard to believe, but hear me out.


So as love stories always start out, he liked me way before I even knew he existed...he's older than me, don't worry not a creep. So I met him because of my mom, he's a family friend, that's how he knew me before I knew him. He was always kind, never clingy, never annoying and definitely never boring; pretty hilarious actually. I always had a good time when he was around, but I never really got to know him on a personal level until high school. Our families never really grew apart we always stayed close and we saw each other at least once a week. His mom and my mom are pretty tight and they were always inviting us over like all the time.


Highschool was a pretty rough time for me. There were times when I was crying on my knees feeling so alone and useless and that no one would ever love me and then there were moments of me feeling so on top of the world that nothing could touch me. With both of these extremes and feelings in the middle, he was always present. He picked me up when I was down, held me in his arms, carried me away from terrible situations and I was always the happiest when I was with him. 


I sort of got the feeling that he had this crush on me in high school and because he was so nice and I felt as if he was the only one there for me so I said, why not let's give it a try..that was the end of my freshman year. We are still together and if anything, he's become more romantic, more loving and more trustworthy throughout the years, if that's even possible. 


The relationship started out pretty slow and he was extremely patient with me because I was terrified and hurt in the past so I couldn't really trust anyone but he never scared me off. He was one of the only people that knew what was going on in my life, so that helped me gain my trust towards him little by little. He's a great listener and I never felt embarrassed to cry in front of him, which says a lot for me. He was always really sweet and understanding when it came to me struggling with drugs and alcohol. He never left my side which you would think he would because he doesn't agree with that type of lifestyle, but he never left me. He always supported me and held my hand through my toughest times. He never bothered me with questions, never really even wanted to talk about it unless I did, it was nice because he was just there for me and never asked me for anything it was sort of like he knew exactly how to deal with my situation and how could someone be SO PATIENT. I have to give him props for that because let me tell you I was ANNOYING when it came to knowing what I wanted and who I wanted. He never pressured me into anything and he treated me like I was the most beautiful jewel in the world, even better. He always did these grand gestures by giving me SO many gifts it was overwhelming at times.


He's still the love of my life and it took me a while to realize what an incredible person he is and he saved my life in high school. Without him being there for me, even at times of being a fly on the wall, I probably wouldn't be here today. So I have a lot to thank him for.


He's extremely romantic and a huge cheeseball with writing me love letters all the time, and he still showers me with gifts; sometimes it's hard for me to receive them. He's always thinking about me and did I mention he's Catholic? So you better believe he does not stop praying for me and he's also always talking about me to his mom, he's extremely proud of who I am. The love he has for me is unconditional and I have finally been able to let him in and trust him with all of my heart (only took like all of my life).


He never forced me into anything and I was able to choose Him.


Capital H. What? Oh yeah, that's right, I'm talking about Jesus Christ. My Prince of Peace, my hero, my savior. I can go on and on with titles to give Him but at the end of the day, they are just titles. It's what I do with those titles to make our relationship grow into something greater then average, to make it radical. He died on the cross, not just for me but for each and every one of you as well. And He would do it all again even if it was just for YOU. I decided to take our relationship to the 'next step'. I don't just go to mass every week, I don't just say a prayer before I eat something, it's so much greater than that.


With inviting Him into my life, I have been showered with love and graces that I could've never imagined I would have. The 'gifts' He has given me I have decided to receive and use them for Him and His plans He has for me. We were all called to greatness, what are you going to do to be great?


This is my love story with Him. What's yours?
xx, Lillie 

Friday, June 26, 2015

Summer Makeup Look!

Hello people! I wanted to make an easy video that focuses on summer and the makeup I usually apply on my face :) 


I hope you enjoy and if you have any tips don't hesitate to comment down below!


What's your favorite makeup product to use in the summer?







xx, Lillie

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Thankful Tuesday

Ello! 


As some of you may know, I went to Honduras in March and it TOTALLY changed my life. I became much more grateful for the things I owned, even the appliances we use everyday like hearing a toilet flush was so marvelous for about two months.. Slowly, that "high" of coming back from Honduras is slipping away and I'm moving on with my life and not realizing how easy we have it here in First World Countries. 


I would like to take a second and to just write down a few things that I'm thankful for so I don't forget the marvelous things we do have here and it will help me have more compassion for those who don't. 


For one, my fridge. I'm lucky enough to have two fridges in my apartment; one that is a community fridge and the other that is a small one in my room. I didn't even realize what a luxury it is to have cold food all the time. 


Another object I'm grateful for is my phone and laptop. I'm able to see all of my friends whenever I want and stay in contact with them on like 5 different social media sites. It saddens me to think that I made such a connection with the families I met in Honduras that now I will probably never see them again or know what is going on in their life. I get so sad thinking of them all the time and wondering what they are doing I can't even imagine having that same problem with my close loved ones as well.


The last thing I want to discuss that I am grateful for is my ability to read and write. Sounds simple, but we have such a privilege to be able to read and write and we take it for granted all the time. It's rare for me to know people who read unless they are English majors like myself, but most people I know do not read. That is something we should be doing everyday and really being grateful that we can do this! I love to read but I know that I do not read enough and I need to start.






What are some 'basic' 'simple' things you are thankful for? 


xx, Lillie 

Friday, June 19, 2015

Feeling Blah.

Anyone ever have one of those days where you just feel as if you can't do anything right and you aren't good enough? Let's talk about it, because I am having one of those WEEKS. It's a terrible feeling and I feel as if I can't escape. I also feel as if I'm a sucky writer but I'm going to write about this anyways because it's the only way I know how to get my feelings out. With writing this post I guess I'll do a little update on my life as well..maybe I'm not sure..we will see where this takes us.


So basically I'm majored in English with Communications; hoping one day that my writing will take me somewhere and my public speaking will as well. I love to read and I love to write. That's all English majors do..so far I mean, I've only taken one class that has to do with my major but that's all we have been doing..we read a novel a week and then write an essay on it. So as you can see, with blogging, journaling & my classes I'm almost always writing. At this moment in time I feel as if I am not good enough and I feel worthless as well. Not just in my writing, but in everything that's happening with my life. In my relationships that I have with people, in my work out routines, in my cooking, just about anything I do I feel as if I - lack of a better word - suck. 

I realize this is all mumble jumble and it might not help any of you because there is probably going to be no advice in this just me ranting about how badly I suck at life and I'll probably be yelling at myself later about this.

I usually know when something is really getting to me when I stop writing in my journal and as predicted, I haven't written in my journal all week long. And let me tell you, a lot has been going on the past couple of weeks. All of my feelings I have towards myself are negative. I am totally insecure even with the clothes I've been putting on my body. I draw a blank in my writing and I realize that I am a terrible writer. But I CAN'T BE A BAD WRITER IF I WANT MY MAJOR TO BE ENGLISH. So that is really getting to me because I love love love to write but I feel as if I'm so redundant and all of my sentences are awkward or just incomplete. When I try to think of better words to use to make it sound more mature and more intelligent it looks as if I'm trying too hard and then I go back to my basic word language which is terrible in my opinion. 

With my relationships, I just feel like I either am not good enough to be in these relationships or that they are better than me in every aspect possible. I also think why the heck they would want to be my friend to begin with. 

I am nothing special.

These thoughts are not accurate. None of them. We were all made in the image and likeness of God Himself. God does NOT make mistakes. We all have gifts, and if we decide to receive what He has given us, then we will flourish and bloom. The hardest thing to do in a relationship is to receive. God wants to give us all these graces and blessings. These negative thoughts I'm having (and maybe some of you are having too) are not from Him. He put us on this Earth to be joyful and to know that this is only temporary and there are greater things to come. We are His children. Not just me, but we ALL are sons and daughters of A KING. A KING. How incredible is that. Our king does not want us to be sad and to look at ourselves in such a demeaning way. I know, I need to take my own advice for once. 

Writing this post doesn't make me feel 100% better, I'm actually still mad at myself because of how awfully written this was. But at least I got it all out, and maybe I'm not alone in feeling this way today (or this week). But I want you all to know that you are good enough. 

You were put on this Earth for a reason, go find that reason and make a change. Be the difference and make people stare at you because we were made to be different and to make people think.

It's okay to be proud of yourself, embrace it. Love yourself, be happy with your actions, and make people's hearts smile.

Again, I apologize for this awfulness. 



(not sure if I showed this already, but if so, then you need to read it again) 


xx, Lillie

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Lip Color Fun - Summer

Cheers for a new lipstick color! Woo! 

So yes, I went to Sephora and fell in love with a color from of course my all time favorite brand for lipsticks, YSL. It's called Rouge Volupté Shine. I have a broad range of different lipstick colors that I own but I didn't feel as if I had a signature lip color for Summer..until I saw Rouge Volupté Shine.




It's more on the coral shade but there is still pink to it. It isn't too bright and honestly I think it looks so pretty right after the beach or if I'm outside on a nature walk or doing something outside I like to wear this color because it really does look good on my skin. Hopefully, if I get tanner this Summer, it will look even better because corals and pinks always make you look tanner.

As I've stated in previous posts about YSL lipsticks, they are so moisturizing and I don't even have to put on lip balm or anything before applying this lipstick because I feel as if I'm wearing lip balm not lipstick. Also, YSL lipsticks are the easiest to apply and I usually never have to clean up around the edges which is quite a big deal for me, not sure if anyone else has that problem of applying lipstick, but I sure do!




Do you have a favorite Summer lip color yet? If not you should totally purchase this one!


xx, Lillie 

Friday, June 5, 2015

Fun Things To Do In The Summer!

Hi you! 


I made this awesome fun video for anyone who doesn't have much to do in the summer and wants some ideas. I had a blast making this with of course the only, Alexa..she films most of my videos so if you don't know her already that's a problem! She also has a YouTube channel as well with a video on it so she can win a trip to Japan! It's a pretty smoking hot video if I'm being honest..


I was able to film this video in my hometown which is not the funnest towns around. I did that on purpose because if I was able to have a fun filled day there then in any town you live in you guys can do the same stuff I did!


 I hope you enjoy!!







xx, Lillie 

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

D.E.A.R.

Do any of you remember in elementary school the acronym D.E.A.R.? It stands for Drop Everything And Read. As adults, or even teenagers, whatever age really I think we should still use that acronym on a daily basis. Our teachers always made us read for twenty minutes a day and it was great because our vocabulary grew as well as our imagination. I think all ages should still use this because I know that I don't read everyday for 20 minutes and if I did not only would my vocabulary be better but also my writing! 


I absolutely love to read and it helps with all aspects of my life honestly. It helps me with stress relief, I can escape the outside world for a bit and just snuggle up with a good book, definitely builds my vocabulary and it also helps me feel for people and be able to get in touch with other people's feelings because it broadens my horizons and opens my mind a bit more. So recently I went a little haywire with buying and borrowing a bunch of books. 


I wanted to show you the books I have on my list to read for the summer and maybe you can join me with reading these and maybe we can have a book club together? I think that would be really cool if we all read the same book at the same time and then when we finished reading it at the end of the month we could talk about what we liked and didn't like through the comments and have a  conversation. 


It will help me read more and you as well if I keep this up! Also, I've never been apart of a book club and have always wanted to be so this might be really fun too. I'm going to show you the book I'm reading now and give a little summary of what it's about and if you think it seems interesting please go out and buy it or borrow it from the library and start reading it with me I'm personally inviting everyone to D.E.A.R. with me this summer :)


The book I'm beginning to read is called The White Tiger by Aravind Adiga. The main character is named Balram Halwai and he is a servant, philosopher, entrepreneur, and murderer. Wow ha, that's a lot to take in! Basically the whole novel is about his life story and how he became the person he is today with all of the hardships in his life and and how religion doesn't create virtue, and money doesn't solve every problem but don't worry because decency can still be found in a corrupt world. I just summed up what it said on the back of the book. 




So what do you say? Wanna join in on this reading fest?


xx, Lillie
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