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Tuesday, May 10, 2016

A Big Thank You

As I sit here and eat my sweet potato, reflecting on my sophomore year, I can truly say that this year has had one of the one of the biggest impacts & self realizations in my life thus far.  Thank you for all of the cries, the messes to clean up, the arguments, the confusion, the hurt, and for the exhaustion. That's what made my year real for me. For the laughs the challenges and the blessings and gifts of new people in my life and a bigger community with a bigger, even more genuine selfless heart that was stretched to its "capacity". It only made me seek Him in a more serving, loving, relentless way. There are so many words and memories to write about, but I am going to keep this concise. 

I was able to experience many witnesses of true faith coming alive and see my faith grow deeper as well. This year broke me down and tore me apart, as someone once said to me, He is taking me to the grave and back. I can totally agree with that. The Lord knew who I needed in my life to get through this past year even if at some points, I was crawling instead of walking. He placed people in my life with a lot of wisdom, strength, and ability to help me carry my cross since I could not do it alone. Through each of these relationships, Christ taught me and continues to teach me what Love is. He taught me to step aside from my own ways and surrender to what I had no control over, which is not easy. I learned patience this year, and meeting people where they are at in the moment of me speaking with them. That is something I am still working on and has been a great light and blessing with the growth of my relationships. 

My relationships grew deeper, with more meaning, more of a reason to fight for them, I was able to see more blessings in my life and be aware of why these people have stepped into my life. All of the goodness and warm fuzzies I can thank God for, just as much as thanking Him for the times of great trial and wrenching of my heart.

It was a whirlwind of events with many trials and blessings. I like to think of it as me surrendering to Christ as much as my human ability will allow, and Him responding with "this is a taste of what you yourself said Yes to" I do believe that this will not be the worst of it and this past year will not be the heaviest cross I carry, but a preview to Him responding to my yes so generously with Love & Compassion. This year He was preparing me for what is coming. With the people placed in my life, the intimate conversations I've been a part of, the events/trips I was involved with, and reunions with other friends were all extremely necessary for where He is taking me. I thank each and every one of you who has been a part of this last crazy year with me and seeing the formation of who I grew to be. I thank you for the intimate conversations I had, the mentoring & ministering, the challenges, the listening ears, the laughs, the cries. 

But most of all, I thank you for being my friend. I thank you for listening to me as I listened to you. For loving me through the trials, for seeing the best of who I can be even when I was just showing the worst of me. I thank you for persevering with me and seeking Christ above all in the friendship to where He was calling us to be with one another.  

Junior year has some big shoes to fill & I'm excited to where it will lead me with all of you! Cheers to a new year! 

xx, Lillie

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